After the small disgression I'm continuing with my grandmother's story. I left it off at the point where she was widowed, with two children, my uncle who was about 12 years old and my mother, who was 3. I had said that she was 30 at the time but when I check back she must have been 32. However, life seems to have gone on more or less normally for my grandmother as one of the many women in the large joint family.
It was soon after this that the second family partition within living memory happened. My great-grandmother had been the 2nd or 3rd out of 4 sisters. Since she had the largest number of descendents (4 daughters and 13 grandchildren at that time), she was given the tharavaadu (the main family house). Her eldest sister who had 2 daughters and 1 son (I think) and 4 or 5 grandchildren at that time was given a house located in the village, previously occupied by a nair family called 'Kaalathe", which is why the family got into the habit of calling the people of that family "Kaalathoru" (people of the Kaalathe family), which they always (and even now) dislike. The next sister, with one daughter and 3 or 4 grandchildren was given a house at a distance from the village at a place called "Kalapaare". This estate had been acquired by some of the uncles of the family during the previous generation. It was highly fertile land, recently reclaimed from the forest, but very isolated. Most the family property was located in and around the village so that it was a very sensible idea to have a family representative on the spot but my great grand aunt could not see it like that. For many years she continued to bemoan the fact that she had been "banished into the forest". For some time she lived with my great-grand mother at our house but the arrangement did not work out and finally she shifted to her own place with her family. The youngest of the four sisters was given the "pathaayapura", just across the fence from our place.
After the partition, the size of the family living at the large house reduced from around 40 to just my great-grandmother, 3 of her daughters (the eldest daughter, my valiyamuthashi, usually lived with her children at her husband's place at Mooriyathu Variyam, one of the largest and richest variyams in our area) and their children. My grandmother with her children lived at the house, her sister (my Kuttimuthashi) lived mostly in Ernakulam where her husband worked as a sanskrit teacher in the Kovilakam School. Some of the children where sent home because Kuttimuthashi could not really manage all children (4 sons and a daughter) and money must also have been tight.The youngest of the sisters, Nooli (Cheriya mutashi) remained unmarried and lived in the tharavadu with my great-grandmother and the rest of them. My great-grandmother's sons had all died in childhood and her brothers left the house one by one, either migrating to their wife's houses or to places of work. Her youngest brother was Ikkandath Echara Warrier, a rather well-known temple architect of his time. He is credited with having carried out the "jirnodharanam" (renovation) of the Poornathrayesha Temple at Tripunithura, the family temple of the Kochi Royal Family and later with the work of covering the temple flag-post of the Guruvayoor Temple with gold. He was employed by the Kochi Royal Family and lived at Kochi. He was married to a Nair lady and hence was in the habit of taking one of his nephews to cook for him. In return they were given boarding and lodging, a certain number of shirts and dhotis and money to learn typing and shorthand. Hence the large number of stenographers in my family. However my uncle (my mother's brother Krishnan) flatly refused to go to Kochi. He disliked Kuttimaan as he was called in the family (because he was the youngest) who had once woken him up from sleep and beaten him when he was a little boy for some minor misdeed. My uncle finished his schooling at the Government School at Chelakara and left home at around 15-16 years, going to Chennai (then of course Madras), living with some relatives and looking for work. I'm not sure who took care of him there but he soon learnt typing and shorthand and found a job with the Railways. This job he stuck to till retirement, even though his relationship with the Railways may best be described as a "love-hate relationship". He admired many things about the organisation and appreciated the comforts and the income he received but never hesitated to point out any irregularities or defiencies he noticed. I may also add that this was his attitude towards most of the things in his life, employer, friends and relatives, newspapers, tradesmen etc.. As soon as he began earning, my grandmother's life improved further because he began sending money home regularly which practice he continued till the family house was finally closed in 1999. This regular income along with the money from the sale of paddy in her own field (gifted by her husband) ensured that though money was never abundant, she was never in any want.
My other uncles left home immediately after school in search of jobs. This was the normal practice of the time (I'm speaking of the times from say the 20's and 30's till about the 70's after which the old massive tharavadus disintegrated, families shrank to 2 or 3 children and nuclear families became the norm in our communties). Children, specially boys, studied as long as the family could support them. After that they left home, usually with some family member or neighbour, to some big city, usually Bombay or Madras where they could find work. Once employed they sent home money to support the household, educate younger siblings and cousins etc,. When these were old enough, if boys. they were in their turn brought to the cities to search for jobs, if girls they were married to suitable men. Dowries were unheard of in our communities and no demands were made on the girls' families. The practice of giving the girl pots and pans, clothes, beds, etc., which obtained in most communities was also not prevalent amongst us. Hence a girl's marriage was not a very difficult task for the family. My family was fortunate that the boys found employment soon and proved to be caring and responsible. But in the absence of boys who would in a previous generation begin to care for family properties and maybe earn new properties for the family, my youngest great aunt, Cheriya mutashi, began to take care of the family property and look after the normal affairs of the household. She was good at it, being an active and intelligent woman. She also became an autocrat in her own household and for many decades her word was law in the house.
My Ammaman (I K Warrier) was, by force of circumstances, i.e., being the eldest boy in the family available at the tharavadu and not having uncles above him living at home, the Karanavar (karnor in colloquial malayalam) of the family from a very young age. Moreover he had a forceful personality, dislike of any form of authority, and a liking for creating some noise around him. However he was essentially a lovable character, with a strong sense of justice, a sense of humor, and a capacity to appreciate the good points of those around him. These circumstances combined to make him into something of a benevolent autocrat. He deserves an entire chapter to himself which I hope will come later.
My grandmother's next sister, Lakshmikutty, whom we called Kuttimuthashi, lived for many years in Ernakulam with her husband, Panangattukara Uzhuthra Warrier, a sanskrit pandit who taught at a school in Kochi (I think maybe at the school for the children of the Royal Family of Kochi Kovilakam). She had 4 sons, Shankaran, Raghavan Kutty (Kunju), Balakrishnan (Balan) and Rudran (Unni). Between Balamaan and Unnimaan came my Cheriyamma, Thankamani. Balamaan had already been sent home to the family house to be brought up at a very young age because Kuttimuthashi could not manage everything. The eldest, Shankaramaan, developed a mental illness (maybe schizophrenia) at about the same time as his father fell ill.When this happened it was all too much for my poor great aunt. Her husband returned to his home to be cared for by his sisters and Kuttimuthashi brought the rest of the family home where she had help from the extended family. Shankaramaan was for some years cared for at home, sometimes with a male helper to manage him. My mother and Cheriyamma were then very young women and sometimes my great-grandmother feared for their safety. After my mother's marriage, he became too violent for the women at home to handle and my uncle took him to Madras and admitted him to a mental hospital where he died quite soon. Before he fell ill Shankaramaan had been bright and intelligent and handsome like all his brothers and my great-grandmother mourned his loss all the rest of her life.
It was soon after this that the second family partition within living memory happened. My great-grandmother had been the 2nd or 3rd out of 4 sisters. Since she had the largest number of descendents (4 daughters and 13 grandchildren at that time), she was given the tharavaadu (the main family house). Her eldest sister who had 2 daughters and 1 son (I think) and 4 or 5 grandchildren at that time was given a house located in the village, previously occupied by a nair family called 'Kaalathe", which is why the family got into the habit of calling the people of that family "Kaalathoru" (people of the Kaalathe family), which they always (and even now) dislike. The next sister, with one daughter and 3 or 4 grandchildren was given a house at a distance from the village at a place called "Kalapaare". This estate had been acquired by some of the uncles of the family during the previous generation. It was highly fertile land, recently reclaimed from the forest, but very isolated. Most the family property was located in and around the village so that it was a very sensible idea to have a family representative on the spot but my great grand aunt could not see it like that. For many years she continued to bemoan the fact that she had been "banished into the forest". For some time she lived with my great-grand mother at our house but the arrangement did not work out and finally she shifted to her own place with her family. The youngest of the four sisters was given the "pathaayapura", just across the fence from our place.
After the partition, the size of the family living at the large house reduced from around 40 to just my great-grandmother, 3 of her daughters (the eldest daughter, my valiyamuthashi, usually lived with her children at her husband's place at Mooriyathu Variyam, one of the largest and richest variyams in our area) and their children. My grandmother with her children lived at the house, her sister (my Kuttimuthashi) lived mostly in Ernakulam where her husband worked as a sanskrit teacher in the Kovilakam School. Some of the children where sent home because Kuttimuthashi could not really manage all children (4 sons and a daughter) and money must also have been tight.The youngest of the sisters, Nooli (Cheriya mutashi) remained unmarried and lived in the tharavadu with my great-grandmother and the rest of them. My great-grandmother's sons had all died in childhood and her brothers left the house one by one, either migrating to their wife's houses or to places of work. Her youngest brother was Ikkandath Echara Warrier, a rather well-known temple architect of his time. He is credited with having carried out the "jirnodharanam" (renovation) of the Poornathrayesha Temple at Tripunithura, the family temple of the Kochi Royal Family and later with the work of covering the temple flag-post of the Guruvayoor Temple with gold. He was employed by the Kochi Royal Family and lived at Kochi. He was married to a Nair lady and hence was in the habit of taking one of his nephews to cook for him. In return they were given boarding and lodging, a certain number of shirts and dhotis and money to learn typing and shorthand. Hence the large number of stenographers in my family. However my uncle (my mother's brother Krishnan) flatly refused to go to Kochi. He disliked Kuttimaan as he was called in the family (because he was the youngest) who had once woken him up from sleep and beaten him when he was a little boy for some minor misdeed. My uncle finished his schooling at the Government School at Chelakara and left home at around 15-16 years, going to Chennai (then of course Madras), living with some relatives and looking for work. I'm not sure who took care of him there but he soon learnt typing and shorthand and found a job with the Railways. This job he stuck to till retirement, even though his relationship with the Railways may best be described as a "love-hate relationship". He admired many things about the organisation and appreciated the comforts and the income he received but never hesitated to point out any irregularities or defiencies he noticed. I may also add that this was his attitude towards most of the things in his life, employer, friends and relatives, newspapers, tradesmen etc.. As soon as he began earning, my grandmother's life improved further because he began sending money home regularly which practice he continued till the family house was finally closed in 1999. This regular income along with the money from the sale of paddy in her own field (gifted by her husband) ensured that though money was never abundant, she was never in any want.
My other uncles left home immediately after school in search of jobs. This was the normal practice of the time (I'm speaking of the times from say the 20's and 30's till about the 70's after which the old massive tharavadus disintegrated, families shrank to 2 or 3 children and nuclear families became the norm in our communties). Children, specially boys, studied as long as the family could support them. After that they left home, usually with some family member or neighbour, to some big city, usually Bombay or Madras where they could find work. Once employed they sent home money to support the household, educate younger siblings and cousins etc,. When these were old enough, if boys. they were in their turn brought to the cities to search for jobs, if girls they were married to suitable men. Dowries were unheard of in our communities and no demands were made on the girls' families. The practice of giving the girl pots and pans, clothes, beds, etc., which obtained in most communities was also not prevalent amongst us. Hence a girl's marriage was not a very difficult task for the family. My family was fortunate that the boys found employment soon and proved to be caring and responsible. But in the absence of boys who would in a previous generation begin to care for family properties and maybe earn new properties for the family, my youngest great aunt, Cheriya mutashi, began to take care of the family property and look after the normal affairs of the household. She was good at it, being an active and intelligent woman. She also became an autocrat in her own household and for many decades her word was law in the house.
My Ammaman (I K Warrier) was, by force of circumstances, i.e., being the eldest boy in the family available at the tharavadu and not having uncles above him living at home, the Karanavar (karnor in colloquial malayalam) of the family from a very young age. Moreover he had a forceful personality, dislike of any form of authority, and a liking for creating some noise around him. However he was essentially a lovable character, with a strong sense of justice, a sense of humor, and a capacity to appreciate the good points of those around him. These circumstances combined to make him into something of a benevolent autocrat. He deserves an entire chapter to himself which I hope will come later.
My grandmother's next sister, Lakshmikutty, whom we called Kuttimuthashi, lived for many years in Ernakulam with her husband, Panangattukara Uzhuthra Warrier, a sanskrit pandit who taught at a school in Kochi (I think maybe at the school for the children of the Royal Family of Kochi Kovilakam). She had 4 sons, Shankaran, Raghavan Kutty (Kunju), Balakrishnan (Balan) and Rudran (Unni). Between Balamaan and Unnimaan came my Cheriyamma, Thankamani. Balamaan had already been sent home to the family house to be brought up at a very young age because Kuttimuthashi could not manage everything. The eldest, Shankaramaan, developed a mental illness (maybe schizophrenia) at about the same time as his father fell ill.When this happened it was all too much for my poor great aunt. Her husband returned to his home to be cared for by his sisters and Kuttimuthashi brought the rest of the family home where she had help from the extended family. Shankaramaan was for some years cared for at home, sometimes with a male helper to manage him. My mother and Cheriyamma were then very young women and sometimes my great-grandmother feared for their safety. After my mother's marriage, he became too violent for the women at home to handle and my uncle took him to Madras and admitted him to a mental hospital where he died quite soon. Before he fell ill Shankaramaan had been bright and intelligent and handsome like all his brothers and my great-grandmother mourned his loss all the rest of her life.
My mother was 9 years younger than my uncle and he has been the authority figure all her life. He was strict and because patience was not his strong point, she was always in awe of him. It appears to have been the normal pattern of family life then. Uncles and elder brothers were regarded with awe, their lightest words being regarded as law and younger brothers were petted and indulged by their sisters. She was sent to the local village school upto 4th Standard and then admitted by Ammaman to the convent school "Little Flower Convent" at Chelakkara, about 3 kms from our house. Many girls from the village attended the school and they walked to school in the morning together, coming back together in the evening. Today the way to Chelakkara is by road but in those days my mother and her friends walked through paddy fields. During the monsoon the were always a few days when the water covered the paddy fields and hid the pathways. Then schools were closed and the children enjoyed a holiday. Upto my mother children of the family had always attended the Govt School at Chelakkara and there was some opposition at putting a girl into the Christian school but that was over-ruled by my uncle who had developed new-fangled notions from his stay at Madras. I had a chance to pass the school a couple of years ago. It has expanded and is one of the largest schools in the area now. My mother studied there from 5th upto the 10th standard. But she did not write the exam for some reason which she has never really explained. My belief is that she did not write the exam for fear of failing.
This bit has been a draft for too long now. I had discontinued the blog for some years, mainly due to laziness and now I want to pick it up again. So I will post this as it is and maybe carry on from here at some later point.
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